# Vape like a Ninja

> A nationwide food stamp system collapse and a high-level military purge signal deep instability as global financial institutions prepare for a digital currency transition.

- **Show:** [The No Agenda Show](https://search.noagendashow.net/index.md)
- **Episode:** 556
- **Published:** 2013-10-13
- **Length:** 2h 35m
- **Topics:** EBT Outage, Military Purge, [Cashless Society](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cashless-society.md), [Nobel Peace Prize](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/nobel-peace-prize.md), Vaping Regulation, [Debt Ceiling](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/debt-ceiling.md)
- **Web page:** https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja

## About this episode

A massive Xerox software failure triggered a multi-state EBT system outage this week, leaving millions of SNAP recipients in California and sixteen other states unable to purchase groceries. Adam Curry and John C. Dvorak analyze the timing of this disruption during Cybersecurity Awareness Month, suggesting the event served as a stress test for public docility. The outage coincides with a coordinated push for a cashless society, evidenced by Dutch mayors promoting Pin Everything Saturdays and a Tufts University study highlighting the hidden costs of physical currency.

The U.S. military is undergoing a leadership purge following the dismissal of Major General Michael Carey and a Navy vice-admiral over allegations of gambling and counterfeit poker chips. These firings occur as Representative Sheila Jackson Lee describes House operations as martial law during the ongoing government shutdown. Meanwhile, JPMorgan Chase reports a $398 million quarterly loss after reserving $23 billion for litigation, yet stock prices rose as the Federal Reserve initiated its annual Comprehensive Capital Analysis and Review to test bank resilience against a potential debt default.

Adam Curry details his transition to a phone-free lifestyle to avoid tower tracking, noting that singing in the car with his wife replaces digital distractions. The duo also critiques the pharmaceutical branding of Eliquis and the rise of Bluetooth-enabled vaporizers. John C. Dvorak explains the culinary distinctions between mutton and lamb while the show prepares for its sixth anniversary with a sack of sixes from the No Agenda producers.

## Chapters

Each chapter's transcript is at its own link. The whole transcript is at https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/transcript.md.

### 1. Sir Scott of the Armory, Economic Hitmen in Uganda (0:00–5:06)

Adam Curry describes a dinner at the home of Sir Scott, a member of the No Agenda Roundtable who runs a reloading station called The Armory. The gathering included guests involved in securing oil contracts in Uganda, whom Curry characterizes as "economic hitmen" based on the writings of John Perkins. The conversation transitions into a discussion about hunting, dressing deer, and the hazards of biting into bird shot while eating grouse.

Keywords: sir scott, the armory, [john perkins](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/john-perkins.md), [uganda](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/uganda.md), [economic hitmen](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/economic-hitmen.md), [hunting](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/hunting.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/1.md)

### 2. Oregon One-Way Grids, Left Turns on Red (5:07–9:25)

John C. Dvorak recounts his experience driving through the "one-way grid" in Portland, Oregon. The discussion explores the legality of making left turns on red lights when transitioning between one-way streets. They note that while New York City prohibits most turns on red, states like Washington, Oregon, Idaho, and Alaska have specific allowances for these maneuvers that often confuse out-of-state drivers.

Keywords: [portland](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/portland.md), [oregon](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/oregon.md), [traffic laws](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/traffic-laws.md), one-way streets, red lights, [driving](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/driving.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/2.md)

### 3. Yankee Doodle Macaroni, Velveeta Ham Radio Commercials (9:26–12:46)

The hosts discuss the historical meaning of the word "macaroni" in the song Yankee Doodle, noting it was 18th-century slang for something ultra-fashionable or "cool." This leads to a discussion about the recurring Velveeta "Ham Radio Guy" commercial and Adam Curry's recent voiceover audition for a National Geographic reality show titled "Sheer Madness" about sheep farming.

Keywords: yankee doodle, macaroni, [velveeta](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/velveeta.md), [ham radio](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ham-radio.md), [voiceover](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/voiceover.md), [national geographic](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/national-geographic.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/3.md)

### 4. TSA Security Announcements, George Bush Intercontinental Airport (12:47–15:17)

Adam Curry plays an audio recording of a security announcement from George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston. The announcement warns travelers that unattended luggage may be treated as a danger and explicitly states that making inappropriate remarks or jokes concerning security may result in arrest. The hosts criticize the aggressive tone of TSA-induced airport messaging.

Keywords: [tsa](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/tsa.md), [airport security](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/airport-security.md), [houston](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/houston.md), george bush airport, [jokes](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/jokes.md), [travel](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/travel.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/4.md)

### 5. EBT System Outage, Xerox Software Upgrade Failure (15:17–18:52)

A routine software upgrade by Xerox caused a massive outage of the Electronic Benefits Transfer (EBT) system, affecting food stamp and SNAP recipients across 17 states including California. Adam Curry suggests the Saturday morning failure might have been a "dry run" or test of public docility during Cybersecurity Awareness Month. The outage left millions unable to purchase groceries until the systems were rebooted hours later.

Keywords: [ebt](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ebt.md), [snap](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/snap.md), xerox, [software upgrade](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/software-upgrade.md), [food stamps](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/food-stamps.md), [cybersecurity awareness month](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cybersecurity-awareness-month.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/5.md)

### 6. Cashless Society Promotion, Tufts University Digital Money Study (18:53–21:51)

Mayors in the Netherlands are actively promoting "Pin Everything" Saturdays to encourage citizens to use debit cards instead of cash for safety and efficiency. Simultaneously, a Tufts University study highlights the high costs and fees associated with cash usage for low-income individuals. The hosts argue these coordinated efforts across continents are designed to force users into digital systems where banks can extract transaction fees.

Keywords: [cashless society](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cashless-society.md), [netherlands](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/netherlands.md), [tufts university](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/tufts-university.md), [debit cards](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/debit-cards.md), [bank fees](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/bank-fees.md), [digital currency](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/digital-currency.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/6.md)

### 7. American Blackout, National Grid Cyber Attack Dramas (21:51–26:35)

The National Geographic Channel is promoting a theatrical event titled "American Blackout," which depicts a total power failure in the U.S. caused by a cyber attack. The hosts compare this to a nearly identical drama aired on Channel 4 in the UK. They mock the technical inaccuracies in the trailers, such as characters using landline phones and watching news reports on television during a total grid collapse.

Keywords: [national geographic](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/national-geographic.md), [american blackout](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/american-blackout.md), [channel 4](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/channel-4.md), [cyber attack](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cyber-attack.md), [smart grid](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/smart-grid.md), [power outage](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/power-outage.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/7.md)

### 8. Sheila Jackson Lee, Martial Law Comments (26:37–29:03)

Texas Representative Sheila Jackson Lee is featured in a clip discussing the government shutdown and a "clean bill" for a continuing resolution. During her floor speech, she claims the House is operating under "martial law," which she defines as the ability to put a bill on the floor in just minutes. The hosts debate whether she was using the term colloquially or accidentally revealing a deeper state of emergency.

Keywords: [sheila jackson lee](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/sheila-jackson-lee.md), [congress](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/congress.md), [martial law](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/martial-law.md), [government shutdown](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/government-shutdown.md), [house of representatives](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/house-of-representatives.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/8.md)

### 9. Nuclear Commander Firings, Military Leadership Purge (29:03–35:03)

The U.S. military has fired several high-ranking officers, including Major General Michael Carey, who oversaw the Air Force's nuclear missile force, and a Navy vice-admiral investigated for using counterfeit poker chips. The hosts discuss an "alarming string" of dismissals involving adultery, gambling, and lack of leadership. They speculate these firings represent a purge of traditionalist generals to replace them with officers more compliant with the current administration's agenda.

Keywords: michael carey, [nuclear arsenal](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/nuclear-arsenal.md), [air force](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/air-force.md), [navy](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/navy.md), [misconduct](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/misconduct.md), [barack obama](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/barack-obama.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/9.md)

### 10. JPMorgan Chase Loss, Mary Ann Lake Litigation Reserves (35:04–41:37)

JPMorgan Chase reported its first quarterly loss since 2004, totaling $398 million, primarily due to massive litigation expenses. CFO Mary Ann Lake detailed that the firm has reserved $23 billion for legal matters, mostly related to mortgage-backed securities. Despite the multi-billion dollar penalties and ongoing negotiations with the government, the bank's stock price rose following the announcement.

Keywords: [jpmorgan chase](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/jpmorgan-chase.md), [jamie dimon](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/jamie-dimon.md), mary ann lake, [litigation](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/litigation.md), [mortgage-backed securities](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/mortgage-backed-securities.md), bank earnings

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/10.md)

### 11. Comprehensive Capital Analysis, Debt Limit Bluff (41:38–45:56)

The Federal Reserve is conducting its annual Comprehensive Capital Analysis and Review (CCAR) to test bank resilience against economic stress. Amidst the U.S. debt ceiling crisis, Jamie Dimon warned that a default would threaten the global recovery and the "repo market" shadow banking system. John C. Dvorak argues the entire political standoff is a bluff by both parties to gain media attention and manipulate market movements for profit.

Keywords: ccar, [federal reserve](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/federal-reserve.md), [debt ceiling](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/debt-ceiling.md), [default](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/default.md), [repo market](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/repo-market.md), [jamie dimon](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/jamie-dimon.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/11.md)

### 12. Market Manipulation, Deutsche Bank Encounter (45:56–49:48)

Adam Curry shares an anecdote about meeting a Deutsche Bank executive at a spin class in Austin. When the banker asked if Curry was an "end the Fed" supporter, Curry jokingly pivoted to advocating for even more quantitative easing to avoid social awkwardness. The hosts discuss the "pump and dump" nature of current markets, where political theater is used to create volatility that benefits institutional investors.

Keywords: [pump and dump](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/pump-and-dump.md), [market volatility](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/market-volatility.md), [deutsche bank](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/deutsche-bank.md), [federal reserve](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/federal-reserve.md), [austin](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/austin.md), [spin class](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/spin-class.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/12.md)

### 13. Mitch McConnell, Tea Party Brand Hijacking (49:51–53:42)

The discussion shifts to the legislative tactics used by Mitch McConnell and John Boehner to control which bills reach the House floor. The hosts argue the "Tea Party" brand was originally a Ron Paul movement that has been hijacked by establishment interests and mainstream media to frame certain congressmen as "terrorists" for their opposition to the Affordable Care Act.

Keywords: [mitch mcconnell](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/mitch-mcconnell.md), [john boehner](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/john-boehner.md), [tea party](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/tea-party.md), [ron paul](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ron-paul.md), [obamacare](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/obamacare.md), [congress](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/congress.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/13.md)

### 14. No Agenda Logistics, APRS Messaging (53:42–58:37)

John C. Dvorak and Adam Curry discuss the technical side of the show, including the "Eric the Shill" spreadsheet and the use of APRS (Automatic Packet Reporting System) for messaging during potential emergencies. They mention a meeting with an iTunes podcast representative and the importance of show indexing, noting that the "No Agenda CD guys" provide better search capabilities than the hosts themselves.

Keywords: [kf5sln](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/kf5sln.md), [aprs](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/aprs.md), [ham radio](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ham-radio.md), [itunes](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/itunes.md), podcast indexing, [value for value](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/value-for-value.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/14.md)

### 15. Executive Producer Credits, Knighting Ceremony (58:38–1:04:39)

The hosts read donation notes from high-tier producers. Sir David Foley promotes 4K equipment, while Sir Richard Garrett celebrates his knighthood with a severance package from a government mailroom job. Christopher Hefley requests "job karma" for his wife Heidi, leading to the playback of the "Mac and Cheese" jingle and a clip of a Japanese official telling a conference to "stop laughing."

Keywords: [david foley](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/david-foley.md), richard garrett, christopher hefley, [knighthood](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/knighthood.md), [karma](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/karma.md), 4kspecial

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/15.md)

### 16. Slave Mart Australia, No Agenda Swag (1:04:38–1:08:09)

A listener in Australia established "Slave Mart," an online store featuring artistic No Agenda-themed merchandise, including "Attack of the Killer Drone" posters. After a brief misunderstanding regarding the store's status, the hosts officially approve the operation and praise the high quality and creativity of the designs, which feature models in gas masks.

Keywords: slavemart.co, [australia](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/australia.md), merch, [drones](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/drones.md), posters, artistic design

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/16.md)

### 17. IFTTT Recipes, Government iPhone Alerts (1:08:09–1:11:07)

Producer Brad Rider created an IFTTT (If This Then That) recipe that allows listeners to receive text messages whenever the "Bat Signal" is fired. This leads to a discussion about the "Giant Voice" government alert system on iPhones, which recently triggered flash flood warnings in Austin. Adam Curry criticizes the alerts as part of the "dumbing down" of a populace that should be able to see rain for themselves.

Keywords: ifttt, [bat signal](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/bat-signal.md), [ios](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ios.md), [flash flood](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/flash-flood.md), [emergency alerts](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/emergency-alerts.md), [automation](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/automation.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/17.md)

### 18. International Day of the Girl, Tech Girls Program (1:11:18–1:15:33)

Secretary of State John Kerry is featured in a clip promoting the "International Day of the Girl" and the State Department's "Tech Girls" exchange program. The hosts mock the rhetoric of "empowered girls" and point out that women already hold significant leadership roles in technology, citing IBM CEO Ginni Rometty and Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer as examples.

Keywords: [john kerry](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/john-kerry.md), [state department](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/state-department.md), [hillary clinton](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/hillary-clinton.md), tech girls, [gender equality](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/gender-equality.md), [ibm](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ibm.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/18.md)

### 19. David the Tech Guy, Blind Speech Cadence (1:15:34–1:18:38)

A 16-year-old listener named David, who is blind and autistic, emails the show to explain why some blind individuals have a "robotic" speech cadence. He attributes it to years of listening to low-quality screen readers like Eloquence or DecTalk. Despite being bullied in school, David expresses his ambition to become a systems administrator rather than relying on social security.

Keywords: [blindness](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/blindness.md), [autism](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/autism.md), [screen readers](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/screen-readers.md), dectalk, braille, [sysadmin](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/sysadmin.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/19.md)

### 20. International Failure Day, Finnish Entrepreneurship (1:18:38–1:20:29)

Finland is celebrating "International Failure Day" to encourage citizens to cast off their fear of making mistakes. The organizers argue that the American entrepreneurial system is built on failure, where failing at one startup often makes it easier to secure funding for the next. The event aims to break the cultural taboo surrounding professional setbacks in Finnish society.

Keywords: [finland](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/finland.md), failure day, [entrepreneurship](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/entrepreneurship.md), [venture capital](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/venture-capital.md), [education](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/education.md), [risk](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/risk.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/20.md)

### 21. Nobel Peace Prize, OPCW Syrian Narrative (1:20:30–1:24:47)

The 2013 Nobel Peace Prize was awarded to the Organization for the Prohibition of Chemical Weapons (OPCW). The hosts argue the prize is being used to support a shifting narrative in Syria, where the focus has moved from regime change to chemical weapon disposal. They play a Human Rights Watch clip detailing rebel atrocities in Latakia, suggesting the media is now being allowed to report on "bad guy" rebels to justify the new diplomatic deal with Russia.

Keywords: [nobel peace prize](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/nobel-peace-prize.md), [opcw](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/opcw.md), [syria](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/syria.md), [chemical weapons](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/chemical-weapons.md), [human rights watch](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/human-rights-watch.md), [war crimes](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/war-crimes.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/21.md)

### 22. Nobel Peace Prize History, Political Rigging (1:24:48–1:28:11)

The hosts review the history of the Nobel Peace Prize, noting suspicious gaps during the Vietnam War and controversial winners like Henry Kissinger and Yasser Arafat. They characterize the prize as a "rigged" tool for political promotion, citing Al Gore's 2007 win alongside the IPCC as a prime example of using the award for media branding.

Keywords: [henry kissinger](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/henry-kissinger.md), [mother teresa](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/mother-teresa.md), [al gore](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/al-gore.md), [kofi annan](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/kofi-annan.md), [ipcc](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ipcc.md), [vietnam war](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/vietnam-war.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/22.md)

### 23. Valerie Plame, CIA vs NSA Conflict (1:28:12–1:32:54)

Former CIA operative Valerie Plame and CNN's Anderson Cooper are featured in clips discussing Edward Snowden. The hosts highlight that both refer to him informally as "Ed," which they interpret as a sign of CIA familiarity. They reiterate their theory that the Snowden leaks are part of an internal war between the CIA and the NSA, noting that the New York Times recently reported the CIA knew of Snowden's intent to expose the NSA as early as 2009.

Keywords: [valerie plame](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/valerie-plame.md), [edward snowden](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/edward-snowden.md), [cia](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cia.md), [nsa](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/nsa.md), [anderson cooper](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/anderson-cooper.md), sam adams award

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/23.md)

### 24. Sam Adams Award, Government Accountability Project (1:32:55–1:36:44)

The "Sam Adams Award for Integrity in Intelligence" given to Edward Snowden is revealed to be an initiative of the Government Accountability Project (GAP). Analysis of GAP's tax filings shows it is a million-dollar lobbying group involved in various political causes, including the "pink slime" food scandal. The hosts argue the award ceremony in Moscow was a staged CIA operation to keep Snowden in the news cycle.

Keywords: sam adams award, gap, whistleblower.org, [lobbying](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/lobbying.md), [pink slime](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/pink-slime.md), [lon snowden](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/lon-snowden.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/24.md)

### 25. Who's Who Scam, Fake Award Industry (1:36:43–1:41:07)

The discussion of the Sam Adams Award leads to a critique of "vanity" awards and directories like "Who's Who in America" and J.D. Power & Associates. The hosts describe these as "your name here" scams where individuals pay hundreds of dollars for leather-bound books or certificates. They joke about creating a "Who's Who in Quantum Physics" or "Great Lovemaking" to exploit people's vanity.

Keywords: who's who, jd power, [scams](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/scams.md), vanity publishing, [quantum physics](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/quantum-physics.md), [piers morgan](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/piers-morgan.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/25.md)

### 26. Life Without Cell Phones, Singing in Cars (1:41:07–1:43:25)

Adam Curry describes his decision to stop carrying a cell phone, opting instead for an iPod Touch with Wi-Fi disabled to avoid tower tracking. He claims this change has enriched his personal life, allowing him and his wife to sing songs together in the car without the distraction of digital devices. John C. Dvorak expresses skepticism about the practicality of being unreachable.

Keywords: [ipod touch](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ipod-touch.md), [privacy](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/privacy.md), [surveillance](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/surveillance.md), [tracking](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/tracking.md), [singing](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/singing.md), [relationships](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/relationships.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/26.md)

### 27. Digital Divorce Evidence, Subpoenaing GPS Data (1:43:26–1:47:22)

An NPR report features divorce lawyer Lee Rosen, who explains how digital records have become a "gold mine" for matrimonial litigation. In North Carolina, private lawyers can issue subpoenas for cellular billing, GPS data, and text messages to prove adultery. The hosts discuss the "Unabomber was right" sentiment regarding the loss of privacy in the digital age and suggest creating fake digital "affairs" to trap prying spouses.

Keywords: [npr](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/npr.md), divorce law, [subpoenas](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/subpoenas.md), [geolocation](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/geolocation.md), adultery, [privacy](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/privacy.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/27.md)

### 28. Luciferian Gift Cards, Dutch Protectorates (1:47:27–1:50:37)

A donor note mentioning "Lucifer" getting rid of Adam Curry leads to a tangent about Satanism in Texas, which the hosts jokingly conclude is just a cover for "wife swappers." They acknowledge a donation from Sir Pate Snakes in Amsterdam, who is granted the "Protectorate of Holland and Friesland," and send "cancer karma" to his uncle.

Keywords: [lucifer](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/lucifer.md), [satanism](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/satanism.md), [holland](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/holland.md), [friesland](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/friesland.md), [cancer karma](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cancer-karma.md), [amsterdam](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/amsterdam.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/28.md)

### 29. Swazzlenuff Karma, Sixth Anniversary Prep (1:50:38–1:54:51)

The hosts process several "sack of sixes" donations ($66.66) in preparation for the show's upcoming sixth anniversary. They discuss the origins of the "swazzlenuff" (69) getting-laid karma and read notes from listeners in Copperopolis, Norway, and Moscow. They emphasize the "value for value" model as the only way to maintain independent analysis.

Keywords: [6969](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/6969.md), swazzlenuff, copperopolis, [norway](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/norway.md), [anniversary](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/anniversary.md), [value for value](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/value-for-value.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/29.md)

### 30. New York Times CIA Ties, Baron Pate (1:54:52–1:57:38)

John C. Dvorak argues that the New York Times refuses to report on the CIA-NSA war because they would have to fire half their editorial staff who have ties to the intelligence community. The segment concludes with the formal knighting of Sir Richard Garrett and Sir Michael Randall, and the elevation of Sir Pate Snakes to Baron Pate.

Keywords: [new york times](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/new-york-times.md), [journalism](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/journalism.md), [cia](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cia.md), editorial staff, [knighthood](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/knighthood.md), [ceremony](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/ceremony.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/30.md)

### 31. Mutton vs Lamb, Texas Smoking Techniques (1:57:39–1:59:55)

A discussion about a dinner party featuring "mutton and mead" leads to a debate over the difference between lamb and mutton. John C. Dvorak explains that mutton is older sheep meat with a distinct, often unpleasant smell due to the fat. Adam Curry recommends smoking lamb over mesquite or pecan wood to eliminate the "muttony" flavor, noting that BBQ is a "religion" in Texas.

Keywords: [mutton](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/mutton.md), [lamb](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/lamb.md), mesquite, pecan wood, smoking meat, texas bbq

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/31.md)

### 32. Eliquis Commercial, Upping My Game (1:59:56–2:02:36)

The hosts analyze a commercial for the blood thinner Eliquis, which uses the slogan "up my game." They mock the pharmaceutical marketing that frames taking a drug for atrial fibrillation as a competitive lifestyle choice. The ad's warnings about "fatal bleeding" and the inability to stop bleeding once started are highlighted as particularly grim.

Keywords: eliquis, warfarin, [stroke](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/stroke.md), bleeding, [pharmaceutical ads](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/pharmaceutical-ads.md), [marketing](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/marketing.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/32.md)

### 33. Afghanistan Troop Presence, Poppy Production (2:02:37–2:04:20)

Secretary of State John Kerry made an unannounced trip to Kabul to discuss keeping U.S. troops in Afghanistan beyond 2014. The hosts speculate that the real reason for the extended stay is to protect the opium poppy production, which they claim finances CIA "off-book" operations. They note that 95% of the world's opium originates in Afghanistan despite efforts to promote alternative crops like cucumbers.

Keywords: [john kerry](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/john-kerry.md), [hamid karzai](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/hamid-karzai.md), [afghanistan](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/afghanistan.md), [opium](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/opium.md), [poppies](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/poppies.md), [cia](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cia.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/33.md)

### 34. Electronic Devices on Planes, American Gangster (2:04:21–2:07:49)

The FAA is moving toward allowing the use of electronic devices during all phases of flight. This leads to a discussion about Southwest Airlines' new Wi-Fi system that uses Microsoft Silverlight, which the hosts find technically frustrating. They also recommend the movie "American Gangster," starring Denzel Washington as drug kingpin Frank Lucas, noting its portrayal of how heroin was smuggled during the Vietnam War.

Keywords: [faa](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/faa.md), [cell phones](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/cell-phones.md), [wifi](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/wifi.md), silverlight, [frank lucas](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/frank-lucas.md), [denzel washington](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/denzel-washington.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/34.md)

### 35. Empty Coffins, Arrival Ceremony Scandal (2:07:50–2:12:33)

A scandal has emerged regarding military "arrival ceremonies" for remains from Vietnam and WWII. Reports indicate that the coffins used in these televised ceremonies are often empty, and the planes are dragged into position on the tarmac rather than having just landed. The hosts suggest this "big lie" is used for public relations and speculate that the ban on photographing coffins might be related to logistical inconsistencies or the smuggling of illicit goods.

Keywords: jpac, [pearl harbor](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/pearl-harbor.md), [vietnam](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/vietnam.md), [mia](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/mia.md), [coffins](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/coffins.md), military honors

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/35.md)

### 36. Vaping Trends, Electronic Cigarette Marketing (2:12:34–2:18:14)

The hosts examine the rise of "vaping" among teenagers, noting that e-cigarettes are being marketed as high-tech accessories. They play a news report from the Bay Area about "vape meets" and the use of vaporizers for both nicotine and marijuana. Adam Curry, a former smoker, argues that e-cigarettes do not actually help people quit smoking but instead re-normalize the behavior and keep users addicted to nicotine.

Keywords: vapes, [e-cigarettes](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/e-cigarettes.md), [nicotine](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/nicotine.md), [marijuana](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/marijuana.md), [vaping](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/vaping.md), [marketing](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/marketing.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/36.md)

### 37. Bluetooth Vapes, Quantified Self App Idea (2:18:14–2:21:57)

Adam Curry proposes a "money-making" product idea: a Bluetooth-enabled vaporizer that syncs with a smartphone app and a Fitbit. The app would track nicotine levels, battery life, and heart rate, tweeting out "I just vaped" along with the user's location and dopamine release. They joke about the "quantified self" movement and the potential for developers to create social networks around vaping.

Keywords: [bluetooth](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/bluetooth.md), [fitbit](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/fitbit.md), [dopamine](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/dopamine.md), [app development](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/app-development.md), [startups](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/startups.md), [technology](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/technology.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/37.md)

### 38. EU E-Cigarette Regulation, Pharmaceutical Bonanza (2:21:57–2:25:17)

The European Parliament is voting on new rules to reclassify e-cigarettes as medicines, which would require manufacturers to undergo costly drug agency licensing. The proposal also includes bans on menthol and slim cigarettes. The hosts view this as a "bonanza" for pharmaceutical companies and a way for governments to control and tax the emerging vaping market.

Keywords: [european parliament](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/european-parliament.md), [regulation](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/regulation.md), [menthol ban](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/menthol-ban.md), [big pharma](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/big-pharma.md), [licensing](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/licensing.md), [tobacco](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/tobacco.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/38.md)

### 39. UK Food Aid, Red Cross Austerity (2:25:18–2:27:52)

For the first time since World War II, the British Red Cross has launched an emergency food aid program in the UK. The hosts discuss how austerity measures and the economic downturn are leading to actual starvation in developed European nations. They characterize the current economic situation as a series of "dry runs" to see how much hardship the public will tolerate before a total collapse.

Keywords: [red cross](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/red-cross.md), [united kingdom](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/united-kingdom.md), [food aid](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/food-aid.md), [austerity](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/austerity.md), [starvation](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/starvation.md), [economic collapse](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/economic-collapse.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/39.md)

### 40. Turkey Headscarf Ban, Erdogan Reforms (2:27:57–2:31:18)

Turkey has lifted a 90-year-old ban on women wearing Islamic headscarves in state institutions. While Prime Minister Erdogan frames this as a democratic reform for religious freedom, critics see it as an erosion of the republic's secular foundations. The hosts predict this is a step toward mandatory religious dress and the eventual implementation of Sharia-influenced policies in Turkey.

Keywords: [turkey](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/turkey.md), [erdogan](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/erdogan.md), [headscarf](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/headscarf.md), [secularism](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/secularism.md), [sharia law](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/sharia-law.md), [istanbul](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/istanbul.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/40.md)

### 41. Shut You Down Montage, Outro (2:31:19–2:35:12)

The show concludes with a "Shut You Down" audio montage produced by Jim Savastak, featuring clips of politicians discussing the government shutdown, wild horses, and the Affordable Care Act. Adam Curry and John C. Dvorak sign off, promising to return for the next episode as the debt ceiling deadline approaches.

Keywords: jim savastak, [montage](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/montage.md), [obamacare](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/obamacare.md), [government shutdown](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/government-shutdown.md), burros, [adios mofo](https://search.noagendashow.net/topic/adios-mofo.md)

[Chapter transcript](https://search.noagendashow.net/episode/556-vape-like-a-ninja/chapter/41.md)

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